To my dear almost 4 year old daughter,
Throughout our days together, there are so many things I want to say to you, but I know that I can’t because you wouldn’t understand. But if I could say exactly what I’m thinking at this moment in time, it would be this.
1) No matter what anyone has told me about your picky eating, it still makes me feel like a bad mom. I know it’s just a phase and that you’re not going hungry, but it still makes me feel like I’m doing something wrong. I admit there are days I am lazy and just put the food I know you’ll eat in front of you to avoid your tears.
2) I desperately want you to understand when I tell you to be nice to the other children. I don’t want a mean girl. When I see you excluding someone on purpose, it worries me. It makes me upset and sometimes even embarrassed. I know that you will figure this out in time. I realize you are at the age where it doesn’t fully make sense yet. I just hope one day soon it will.
3) I struggle with wanting you to be able to do things for yourself and loving that you still need me so much. I never want to hold you back from progressing in your skills of self sufficiency, but I secretly love when you ask me to help you. Yes, it’s draining, but I know that the years are short. I hope my actions don’t confuse you in anyway.
4) Sometimes I don’t know all the words to the songs you like and that is ok. It’s annoying when you have to correct everything I do. It’s not polite to continuously correct someone, especially your elders.
5) I hate to burst your bubble, but my favorite color is not purple. Despite your constant declaration that Mommy’s favorite color is purple and yours is pink, my favorite color is red.
6) It is ok to play with trucks and tools and cars. These aren’t just boy stuff.
7) I will never get tired of hearing you laugh or hearing the words “I love you mommy.”
8) Treat your toys better. We’ve worked hard to be able to buy you what you have. Also, have you forgotten Toy Story? What are your toys thinking?
9) Mommy is not perfect. Nobody is. It is okay for you or a situation to not be perfect.
10) While I am so proud of the little girl you’ve become, I miss my baby. I miss the quiet moments we had rocking in the glider listening to lullabies. I often sit and wonder where that baby went.
That’s all for now sweet girl.