Squad. Crew. Team. Tribe. Whatever you want to call it. It all stands for solidarity.
At least that’s how I feel about the wonderful group of moms I have met through the years. They are my Mom Squad. We’ve talked about our children, our marriages, our lives. We’ve shared laughs and frustrations and tears. It’s a bond that one would think should take decades to build. Yet just like the fast paced life of motherhood, our friendships grew at a rapid rate. Maybe it’s part natural chemistry. Maybe it’s part experiencing the same crazy life of a mom. It’s that knowing look we give each other when something happens. A look that says, “yes, I know exactly how you feel“. Whatever it is, I found my tribe, my squad, in a select few women and have been so grateful to each of them.
However, a time may come where our friendship will be tested. And I fear that time is soon.
A few weeks ago, as I entered a cafeteria filled with other mothers who were also there for kindergarten orientation, it hit me. It hit me as I searched the sea of faces for one familiar one. It hit me as I watched small groups of mothers laughing and joking like they’ve known each other for years. It hit me smack in the face. For the first time in a while, I was without my mom squad. I was without my support system. I smiled at anyone who I could make eye contact with but ended up seated alone and fiddling through the papers we had received in our orientation folders.
When I became a new mom, I would joke about mom dating. It felt lonely and almost impossible to meet other new moms that I had things in common with other than our children. I was lucky to have found my MFF in a mommy and me class. Then along the way, I picked up my dance moms and fitness moms. Yep, I had my little tribe of women who made this crazy journey easier, funnier and less lonely.
But as I sat in that cafeteria, I knew things were changing. One mom was moving to another state. The other would not be in same school system. Another mom, who has an older girl, may find herself in a different dance class come the fall. The squad was falling apart! Well at least that’s how I felt that morning while sitting all alone and vulnerable!
After the orientation was over, I sent some texts expressing my sadness at the changes ahead. As if it’s not hard enough watching your baby grow up! But now add the shift in your motherhood foundation. We all said no matter what, we are still there for each other regardless of same schools or even same states. I crossed the hall to get my daughter from the classroom she spent the morning observing. She greeted me with a big smile and bursting with stories to tell.
After she finished, she asked me if I had made any friends. I smiled at her but she knew it was only half hearted. “Just be yourself and you’ll make friends, Mommy” she comforted.
“I will“, I told her. I will.